INSPIRATION

Tell me. What comes to mind?

Writer's Poison

From my latest purchase.

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James Baldwin

" At four o'clock in the morning, when everybody's drunk enough, then extraordinary things happen."

In Paris, Baldwin spent many long nights in cafe's drinking and arguing with writers James Jones and William Styron, fellow compatriots with a similar fondness for booze. A Jone's home, where they would often start out and end up, Jones had a bar made out of an old church pulpit. Late at nihjt, Baldwin, who in his youth had been a preacher, would entertain his friends by delivering mock sermons on the evils of drink.

Shandy Gaff 
The Shandy Gaff is a beer with ginger ale. Originally created in Great Britain, shandies have been around since the 1800's.


8oz. Larger Beer or amber ale.

8oz. ginger ale
Pour beer into a chilled beer mug, add ginger ale.

From:Tell Me How Long The Train's Been Gone 1968
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Our mother returned and she poured the drinks. I wasn't really permitted to drink and luckily, in those days, I didn't like to drink, but this prohibition, like all my parents prohibitions, was rendered a dead letter by the fact that my parents knew very well that I did whatever I wished outside. Now, my mother said, "I'm making your real weak Leo," and handed me the glass of ginger ale only faintly coloured by whiskey. "That's just so you can feel part of the family." she said, and handed drinks to my father and Caleb and sat down. Caleb and our father looked at each other, but neither of them smiled. I drank my ginger ale. Thought of a girl I knew. Tried to think of everything but the room I was in, and the people I was with.

PS! I've never read Baldwin but having read this passage I now I reckon I have to look him up.
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Hemingway & Bailey's Bartending Guide to Great American Writers.(Workman Publishing House 2006)

Amy Winehouse Died Today

That is really sad news. I've always hoped that she would somehow work he way through all her emotional and psychological problems but that was not to be. No one knows right now what happened the police are saying unknown course but some reports say she died after a three day drinking binge. If that is indeed true, then this really was a sad way to go. This is a sad example of how destructive drugs and alcohol are.

Here is a little reminder of how talented Amy was:

OMG This is epic _ American Gods on TV

Today I very nearly screamed my house down from excitement when I heard this. WhenI tweeted the news I could hardly type. I learnt that HBO is definately in the throws of making a TV series out of my most favourite novel: American Gods. And the DOUBLE EPIC, who did the cinematographer Robert Richardson announce he'd like to cast as Shadow? None other than the divinely beautiful, dark, broody and soft hearted Joe Manganiello. I would happily declare that this is the most beautiful man on the face of the earth. Much to my hubby's whom I have been telling for years to get his jaw off the floor and get over his unhealthy relationship with Shakira's hips. 

Enough about this fine specimen. I thought the rest of the cast was tops too except for the girl that is supposed to act as the beautiful Laura (Shadow's late wife). I don't think she meets the standard looks wise. But there rest, awesome. Check it out. 2013 feels a million years away. 

I LOVE YOU HBO. I'm not worried one bit about American Gods in your hands, you've done fabulous work in the recent past. WOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! I have not been this excited about TV since True Blood.

The rest of the proposed cast membersI also think were matched perfectly taken from Den of Geek:

Mr Wednesday - Brendan Gleeson

(there could not be a more perfect Mr. Wednesday)

Czernobog-  Michael Ironside
(Czernobog like crushing brains with a hammer, how apt is the actors name?)

Mad Sweeney - Robert Carlisle
Low-Key Lyesmith - Jackie Earl Haley

Hinzelmann - Mickey Rooney

Mr Ibis - Mark Gatiss

Mr Jacquel - Idris Elba

(Oh yes I definately like him for this role)

Cosmopolitan Gets A Makeover

Yesterday I bought my first copy of Cosmo after 9 years. I remember buying my last one just before I relocated from my home town, Cape Town to Johannesburg. I suppose I got tired of all the gloss and what I thought at the time was impractical advise. What made me buy this one? This Barbados girl in a ridiculous multicoloured, mostly pink getup with preposterously red tresses is one of my favourite entertainers. She caught my eye and I thought, I wonder what this child is up to now? So I ended  up buying this once constant companion one more time.

Today while sitting at the laundry service, my washing machine kicked the bucket ( I sense a pun in here) I took it out of my bag and tore it out of its own plastic cover irritably....is this really necessary, do we not have enough plastic floating about already?

So anyway here I start paging through it and stopped on the Editors Note Page, this is as far as I got because now I'm typing this post to resume with my paging on another laundry day.
Firstly the editor is introducing a column that will be manned by......(what can I say) men. Prior to this I think they only had female writers and I just checked their staff directory and it does indeed look female. These two males (Matte Du Plessis and Sipho Hlongwane) have been given carte blanche over their column content, they are to say it like it is_ no holds barred. The editor seems to think that things have progressed to the stage where the female has to listen to what this other half thinks (her words). Is this chick for real?

I suppose there are merits to this idea but has she considered all the variables? Is it trully wise to tell a man to be as honest as possible? Do we really want to have it laid bear in permanent ink that they do indeed think you could do with less protrusion at your posteria or that they would rather be ice fishing than going sofa shopping with you or that their mother is the prototype from which all females were to be modeled but somewhere along the line things went horribly wrong, or all the other things we like to pretend they don't think? Do we really want to see all that and worse in hard print. Hhhhhmmmm! I suppose we could get to understand the Marsians better, at least I hope that's the motivation behind it all.

The other interesting thing she mentions is that they are featuring their first hair giude for all sistas with ethnic hair. I can't wait to get to it, I just skimmed through and it looks very promising. This will certainly be a first in South Africa, a magazine doing thorough research and gives relevant advise on this issue. I wish the same could be done for ethnic skinn, there are so many face products any yet so difficult to  find decent, affordable products specifically designed for our skin types.

Anyway, it looks as though Cosmo is intent on a revamp and it couldn't have been better timed considering that a couple of months ago magazine sales figures were reported to have hit an all time low, this is after all considered by many to be a luxury item. I may just buy the August issue.

Mother and Son Chat About Cutting The Sausage....

My son was never as entertained as he was today when we unexpectedly had a chat about his upcoming circumcision. The conversation was prompted by a comment on this topic on the radio after we dropped his sisters off at school.

I asked if he knew what this was...yes he said and explained it. When I first mentioned how this was relevant for him erupted: “there’s no way I’m doing that, what about the pain and how am I expected to pee”.  Realising I wasn’t doing well I used baby Jesus, I thought explaining His circumcision easier, its too complex to go into all the tribal customs and it would in all probability scare him off so I used religion.

So persuasively I said, well at least if we do it now I’m sure it will be under anaesthesia. Eagerly he responded: so I won’t feel it – well I suppose that’s ok, and because I’m not a doctor I backtracked trying to cover my tracks and said, well I hope you won’t be awake but if not asleep I think your sausage will definitely be. At this he giggled to no end, because I went on further to say inducing sausage sleep might be done my injecting the anaesthesia somewhere in its vicinity and so for a while he may not even know that he has one. If I knew this is what it would take to make my normally calm, cool as a cucumber son to get into a fit of uncontrollable laughter I may have had this conversation with him sooner.

I further explained to him that at least he was lucky because come the age of 18 he would have had to go through a rite of passage (embellishment). I would have had to send him to my former home in the rural villages of the Eastern Cape and then as a young man he’d have go deep in the forest to stand in line with other boys his age. Here he would bear his family jewels and a man would come down the line with a butcher knife and swiftly pull and chop, like a Japanese chef preparing sushi (it was much funnier when instead of chop I said qups, using our click version of the q).
This of course is all true but would not necessarily be practised by yours truly. All he said when he caught his breath was: “BOY AM I GLAD I DON’T LIVE IN THAT VILLAGE!!!!!”.

I cropped the bottom bit out because I didn't put an adult content
warning on this postbut if enough people are curios or interested,
I can do a whole post on Xhosa Circumcision, just let me know in comments

When you are a mother I believe you have exclusive rights to: the end justifies the means.
This is a controversial topic I know but my reasons for insisting on it are not so much cultural than pragmatic: 1. It’s just healthy 2. is aesthetic appeal (I know gross coming from his mom)  and 3. an early wedding present to my daughter in law who I’m sure will be grateful forever and eternity, whichever comes first.
I’m a mom,. so I think I’m allowed to chat about these things right? Have you had these with your son and hopefully NOT daughter as its been known to happen?

Today I chat to a diva, writer and blogger amongst other things, Myne Whitman. She is the author of  two romance novels, A Heart to Mend and A Love Rikindled which I have just enjoyed myself. Lookout for the review next Monday. My short summary on A Love Rekindled is that it is a beautiful story of the pervasive and perdurable nature of true love. I find it to be an intense, entertaining and good ol' fashion feel good  story that I anyne who's ever been in love will relate to. Now I hand the reigns over to Myne to tell us about her writing and her books and blogs.more of Myne Whitman on Luminary Wednesday

Kids Look In Books

 

 

 

 

 

My son has published his first book review and is quite anxious to hear what everyone has to say so please head on over to Fab Reads and kindly give him some feedback. I look forward to hearing from you happy weekend y'all (=

Search Amazon.com for coraline book

This is a story about.
It is about a girl who moves into a strange but big flat. Where she meets three strange neighbours their names were Mr Bubo, a really tall man who says he trains rats to be in a circus. Then there’s Miss Spinks and Miss Forcible, they say they use to be actors in the olden days, I wonder how since they're so fat and lumpy.More...

Again on my Xhosa_ness

I must warn you that this is a long post on account of it being some of my memories of the beliefs and customs of my people. Remember today is the last day for the Blood Reaction Giveaway entry, I'll link again at the bottom: Blood Reaction Giveaway

Today I was listening to one of the radio stations which cater mainly for young adults (metro fm) and the presenter (T Bo Touch) was saying his aunt on seeing that he was frequently using eye drops suggested that he use “umchamo wemfene” (monkey pee) to help him deal with his problem. What baffled him and his co hosts was how one goes about getting monkey pee and why that would work as he got confirmation from three sources about the power of this remedy. Of course everyone went into fits of laughter in the studio and they started talking about how “wack” all these home brewed remedies are and anyway who would believe such a thing.
Actually I have seen this thing they call monkey pee even though I was very young when last I laid eyes on it. I remember walking a distance of such magnitude from school that we would get bored and find things to play with along the road and one of the games was kicking ball using this  "umchamo wemfene", a brow/green sack like thing that when you touched it felt like powered felt (the fabric and was the size of a fist). When you popped it open you’d discover that it was filled with a power like substance of the same color. Undoubtedly to use it as pea I'm sure you had to soak it to draw out the "flavor". In fact if I were to hazard a guess I would say it was some type of plant that resembled something like horse droppings (I can’t imagine an animal having such waste). Why it is called monkey pee I have yet to discover because there is no type of pee that is of that size and consistency. There must be a story behind it all.

Current newspaper who's viewership
is mainly black low income earners.

I also understand why these Y2K kids were baffled, they cannot possibly know anything about these things because even us, born in the cusp of emergence of this high-tech era have long since become the so called City Folk and we no longer know the remedies “raads” that our mothers and grandmothers used to share. I remember my mom using a baby’s morning pea to wash a festering wound that wouldn't heal and all sorts of other things which just make my body crawl thinking about them now but back then seemed very natural.


How about this one, to ward off evil spirits she had us scrub our bodies with this bulb of some plant that would sting you right through for at least for 4 hours after that blistering cold bath. You had to sit on your hands to stop yourself from scratching the itch because if you start you can’t stop and if you bruise your skin its like the fires of hell were let lose upon you. And from the number of times we had to endure this bath in a month, you would be right in guessing that there we a whole lot of evil spirits floating which now begs the question, just how useful was this torture which I'm sure would have done any devoted soldier of The Führer very proud.

He looks very evil indeed.

Oh God, thank you for Christianity, I would have been a Christian for the freedom alone if nothing else. African customs and religion is a lot of hard work. I can remember how every December we would have this man come to the house to give us little nicks on certain body parts with his razor blade and then smear a tar like coal tasting substance on them which ensured that even if the scar heals, you've been tattooed for ever and a day. This was before he would have you put the same thing on your tongue to swallow ( I should mention that you were not there when this was cooked up and so have no idea what the hell went in there).  This was also apparently meant to ward off evil spirits and evil persons.Oddly enough the most evil of people we those very ones living under or visiting our roof frequently, but that’s another story for memoir for my children. I don’t have a nice ending to wrap up this post because even as I type my mind is being deliciously  tickled by distant memories. Its odd how a little thing like a comment made by someone in passing can open the floodgates to your past. It occurs to me now that the more "civilized" we become, the less magic there is.


I am reminded of the story of the African twins in Neil Gaiman’s American Gods who get transported by slave masters from their home to America and even in slavery they carried their magic and ancestral gods with them. But I bet you not many in the states know of this magic now, unless perhaps, they are native Americans.


We South African, struggle to believe and hold on to them here in Africa, how can one who is thousands of miles away have be expected to remember.


Do you come from a deeply cultural background and if so, what spiritual history do you carry?

Remember: Blood Reaction Giveaway

Reading List Wk 1

Wanna know what's on my nightstand this week?

Check it out on: Fabulosity Reads This 

 

Yesterday  while on twitter and came across Sochi Azuh and found his very entertaining attempt at

poetry. It actually made me chuckle so I thought it may do the same for you too.

A BEGINNER’S LIVE GUIDE BAD ARSE SLAM
 
Dear reader, further to our previous chapter
We shall now proceed to our subject matter;
Though not guaranteed to make your rhymes smarter
It will break your fall if you should shudder, stutter and falter
Don’t chew, don’t sag – God, please don’t sag
Unless your poetry can afford you a Bentley or a Jag
Pick up modest verbs where your painted tears once fell
And please use adjectives that your mother can actually spell
As thumb rule, dear reader, KEEP YOUR SHIRT ON
Audience, as their sanity, are in habit of going off with your button
So while good if you, like IKECHUKWU, have a six-pack that can stun
God help us, if it’s a one-pack that smacks of bad porn
A black shirt, has been the best bet yet
Anything you say afterwards is politically correct
But PINK – oh no! is as weak as you can get
It says, “I’m too sissy for my shirt”
Having said this, disabuse the psyche
That you are only a rockstar if you lick the mic
Or jump into the crowd or ride a power bike
The truth is the audience will not catch even a poet they like
And when you walk up to that mic, go in hard
Say, “ME BAD! ME THE BADDEST DUB YOU EVER HAD!”
So, in case you mess up real bad, we like to add
Your audience, hopefully, won’t remember you like a bad TV ad.

Perfection

THIS IS IT.

Happy Fourth of July to all in the New World.

Gifts on Thursday Giveaway

Blood Reaction Giveaway

There is a Giveaway at Fabulosity Reads, an opportunity to win one of 13 Blood Reaction novels by author DL Atha. Its a great book by a very talented author, dont miss out. Entries close on the 7th July 2011.

I'm hoping to see all my blog friends make the way there.

Cheers

Bloof Reaction Giveaway

PERFECTION

THIS IS IT.

My Prince Is Not SO Charming

Why is "happilyeverafter" so prodigiously anomalous these days. Is it so bad for Charlene Whittstock to ask for a quiet, happy wedding before having to wake up to all the muck on her return from her honeymoon. Even more than this, is it so impossible for her to expect a happy marriage?

If the reports are indeed true, then I truly feel so sorry for our Benoni (Johannesburg) gal who yesterday tied the not with Prince Albert of Monocco. Seemingly this little man can't keep his zipper closed what with 2 children from other relations and a third possibly on the way and not with his fiancee. This banal tendency is not what we expect from the erudite but more and more these days it would seem these are futile expectations. Perhaps it is a god complex that makes the powerful imagine they are above reproach.On Thursday her dad was on our radio stations assuring us that all was fair weather in the Kingdom but not according to news paper reports who also quoted the father of the brides radio speech. What actually disturbed me most about this is that one of the reports mentions that she was at the airport with a one way ticket to SA when she was held and her passport confiscated so that the royal royal entourage could persuade her differently. 

For her sake (and I believe Charlene is a wonderful girl) I hope this is all media hogwash otherwise I fear, this has all the earmarks of a perilous marriage about to begin. We, the serfs and the like (even if we're not residents of Monocco) stil want to believe in something perfect, true and otherworldly about royalty.Blame it on all that snow white, glass slipper and pea under 20 mattresses nonsense that was hammered into us growing up, we can't help it we being a products of our environment to a degree. Royals, pull your s*** together and give us the fairy-tale, we do not want a South African sequel to the Diana fiasco, poor girl.

Read the whole sad tale here: My prince is not so charming